I recently found myself answering to my friend Ryan Rowe’s comment on one of the photos I posted. He’d made reference to his hairstyle on some of the pictures. I replied that he looks good (cause if you know Ryan, the playah, then you know he’s a good-looking guy). So he asked me how I preferred my own hair: short or long?
For most people the answer would be fairly simple. Not in my case. Because that question left me asking myself many more questions. At this point in time, it’s not just about the hair and despite all I’ve gone through and am going through as we speak, it seems that hair isn’t just hair.
Somehow hair speaks volumes and not in a Sassoon / Matrix kind of way. I know what it’s like to lose all my hair and be bald. I know what it’s like to feel that it’s not such a big deal when you’re fighting for your life. I also know what it’s like to be so happy that chemotherapy is over, to feel so alive that going out there bald for everyone to see feels right regardless of the stares. People stared alright and not necessarily in a nice way just as friends stood by me seemingly unashamed.
People who saw me bald or wearing a scarf / bonnet on my head would sometimes ask questions…and would then share pieces of a story; their own or that of a loved one. In many respects, it was very humbling. It also allowed me to connect with people on a very different level and in a way that would otherwise be impossible.
The fact is that life taught me to appreciate a whole lot of things in a new way. I’m happy to simply have hair. I try to have fun with it and that goes for all lengths: from my GI Jane look (as Ross likes to call it) to the mohawk to today’s curls. “I liked your hair short!” as Shawna says. Losing my hair isn’t one of the side effects of the treatment I’m doing now and although hair isn’t such an important thing, I’m happy to have a full head of it. I’m happy that people can’t tell just by looking at me…and then I remember all that it brought me when people could just tell.
I try to make the best of every situation. I’m lucky to have my hair…I’m growing it out and right now I’m looking forward to wearing it long. Hope that answers your question Ryan. :-)